This time last week, I sat on the sofa thinking about going to bed early. Not because I was tired. But because for the first time in over a year, I would be getting up on a Monday morning and going to work like the rest of the population.
It had been 18 months since I last worked Monday to Friday and to be honest, I was becoming accustomed to my 3 days working week. Unfortunately, the financial loss when working part-time is a lot, especially when you’re not entitled to any benefits such as working/child tax credits. So, I had to put on my big girl knickers and rationalise any thoughts that would persuade me to not go through with this change.
I dropped Ellie-bear with her grandparents earlier that evening which is roughly an hour and a half away. Stayed for a while to watch her settle into her normal routine of going in and out of cupboards. Then I gave her a few good kisses and hugs and said my goodbyes, only to hear her say “bye-bye” back. At that point, I wasn’t sure how I was going to cope during the week without her.
Monday rolled around and I walked into the office thinking ‘where do I sit?’ Up until this point I had not worked on the same day as my colleague whom I was job-sharing with.
Aha! First dilemma of the day…
Even though it wasn’t really a serious issue, if it could even be called that.
I guess, I was trying to find any reason why this 5-day working thing wouldn’t work. The day went by and I was less and less enthused by it. Let’s just say Monday was a drag.
Can I be really real with you?
I often stared blankly at the screen thinking about watching Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom or hearing Eliana sing the Peppa Pig theme tune before moving the toy’s of the toy box so she could sit close enough to the TV to watch her favourite cartoon in the morning.
By Wednesday I thought to myself ‘how did I ever do this before?’ as I was so tired and by Friday I just wanted to get out of there and go to bring my baby home so I could snuggle up next to her. It’s made me appreciate the sacrifice’s parents make for their children. I would love nothing more than to look after Ellie-bear full-time until she’s ready to go to School.
It’s never straightforward when trying to find a balance between work and parenting. I’m looking at childcare closer to home so I can still be there for her in the morning/evenings. Childcare is also super expensive so that’s a whole other topic which demands a post by itself.
As I’m writing this, I’m thinking about what my second full week at work will be like and if it will be better than last weeks. I’m sure as the week’s go by and once her childcare situation is fully sorted I will feel more at ease.
For now, I’m going to need your prayers to make it through another week without my baby to come home to at the end of the night. I guess it’s bitter-sweet as underneath I’m happy for the opportunity to get back into full-time work but I miss my Ellie-bear during the week.
Till next time…
Love Lenny xx
Oh Mummy Dearest 